Olde Timey Classic: Beef Wellington

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I based my beef Wellington off Gordon Ramsay's. His major innovation was to use a mushroom duxelle instead of a traditional pate. My innovation was to change the cut of meat from a fillet of beef which can run you up to $50, to a top rump. Incredibly, I picked up a 1.89kg slab of top rump for a measly $8, which was good as I had to feed NINE people in one sitting. I manged to feed everyone comfortably...for $8. This has to be some sort of record.

Making this thing is a little tricky, but is a sure way to please a dinner party. And the satisfaction of cutting into the pastry to reveal a perfectly rare steak inside is like the feeling a kid gets digging into a kinder egg times a thousand.

Go Get:

Top rump of Beef

400g of 'shrooms. I used a mixture of wild and chessnut purchased from the awesome Borough Street Market.

16 slices of prosciutto.

Splash of white wine.

1lb of Puff pastry.

2 Beaten eggs.

English mustard.

Flour for dusting.

The Action:

1. Be sure to trim off the excess fat on the beef using a sharp knife. Season with salt and pepper seal the beef on all sides in a frying pan with a little butter. As this is a large piece of meat, you might want to do this for 15 minutes. Turn your oven on.

2. Put your mushrooms into a blender and blend until in small chunks, not a smoothie.

3. Fry the mushrooms without using any oil or butter. Add some white wine and cook until all the water has been evaporated. This may take up to 15 mins.

4. Lay some clingfilm down on your countertop, and arrange the prosciutto slices into a sheet so each slice is overlapping. Spread your mushrooms evenly on top. Cover the beef all over with a nice coat of mustard. Roll your beef up like a cigarette and secure by twisting the ends of the clingfilm. Refrigerate for 20 mins.

5. Roll out your pastry and connect the different sheets by overlapping and pressing down with the back of a spoon. Unwrap your beef-mushroom-ham ball and place in the middle of your puff pastry. Spread the egg wash on the pastry either side of the beef and cover with pastry.

6. Score the pastry using the back of a knife and glaze using more egg wash. Season with salt and pepper and stick in the oven. It takes around 45 mins for a rare center, and 55 for medium-rare.

7. To serve, cut into inch thick slices. Be sure to use a really sharp knife or you risk making the whole thing collapse into a messy heap.

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A Hearty Soup for a Depressing, Frigid January.

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It's that time of the year again-the dead of winter. Now That I live in Texas, January has become a bearable even pleasant month. This however, was not the case when I was living in Nottingham as a student. Winter jackets had to be worn at all times and it was weird not to see your own breath in the morning. As a response, I came up with a cheap and delicious Lentil and Bacon soup recipe to warm you up and kick those winter woes. It serves 5-6 and costs next to nothing per serving.

Go Get:

4-5 Rashers of bacon.

1/4 pack of Red Lentils.

2 Carrots.

3 Sticks Celery.

1 Large Onion.

1. Can of Dices tomatoes.

Half a Butternut squash.

3 Cloves of Garlic.

800ml of Chicken stock.

The Action:

1. Fry the bacon until cooked through and remove from the pan. Saute the rest of the chopped up vegetables on a high heat in the bacon juices until golden brown, or for around 15 minutes.

2. Add the lentils, can of tomatoes, half of the stock and the cumin to the pot. Simmer for 45 mins.

3. Throw the soup mixture into a blender and blend til smooth. Add more stock to get to the right consistency. Season with salt & pepper to taste and serve garnished with a celery leaf and olive oil. Pair the soup with some crusty bread and you've got yourself a meal.

"Pink Fish" (As the Ebsworth's Call it): Teriyaki Salmon with Stir Fried Vegetables and Vinegar Rice

I recently watched the documentary Food Matters (You can watch the entire thing here). Despite some dubious claims that huge amounts of vitamin C could cure cancer, it raised some valid points. Apparently, the Western diet is hugely lacking in vitamins and minerals. We walk around every day tired as shit, just waiting to get cancer. So in response, I cooked this dish which contains not one, but TWO *gasp* super-foods - wild salmon and broccoli. This dish is quick and easy, serves two and costs around $4 a head. It would be drastically cheaper if I used farmed salmon, but fuck it. This time I'm doing luxury.

Go Get:

Half a pound of salmon fillet

Soy Sauce

Sake/ white wine.

Mirin (if you don't have any, just use sugar)

3 Cloves of Garlic.

2 Inches of Ginger

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2 Carrots

Broccoli

3-4 Mushrooms

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175 g (1 Cup) White rice

Red wine/ white wine vinegar

1 tsp of sugar.

The Action

1. We need to create a marinade for the fish. Cut up three cloves of garlic and grate an inch of ginger root. Take the Sake (or white wine) and soy sauce and pour into a ziploc bag in equal amounts with the garlic and ginger. Put your fish in the bag, and leave in your fridge for at least 2 hours.

2. When it gets close to dinner time, put the rice in salted boiling water and simmer for 20 minutes. Meanwhile, peel the carrots and then strip them using a potato peeler. Chop up your broccoli and crumble your mushrooms. Set Aside.

3. Heat up a saucepan until very hot. Put 3 tbsp of oil in the pan (I used sesame seed oil) . Place the fish skin side down and cook for approx 3 minutes. At the same time heat a second pan and throw in your vegetables. Add a spash of soy sauce and a pinch of sugar to the veggies as you cook 'em.

4. Flip your fish and cook for a further 3 minutes and remove from pan.

5. Combine 5 tbsp of vinegar (you can use white or rice) with a tbsp of sugar in a small bowl. Microwave, and add to your fully cooked rice.

Plate up and enjoy!

Screw Dominoes: Presenting a DYI Mushroom, Mozzarella and Pesto Thin Crust Pizza that Costs Under Two Bucks

This recipe is a perfect example on how you can cook better, cheaper and more healthy than fast food chains. And this for my American readers, is a step towards not being so fucking fat. This meal takes under 30 minutes from cutting board to mouth, which is around the same time as a delivery.

Go get:

Fleishmann's Pizza Crust Yeast.

Flour (If you don't have any already).

Sugar.

Butter/vegetable spread.

Olive Oil.

A block of Mozzarella.

6 or 7 mushrooms (We used the darker colour variety for presentation's sake).

A bag of spinach.

A jar of Pesto (We used the stuff in a sachet which worked just as well, and was really cheap).

3-4 Cloves of Garlic.

The Action:

1. Follow the directions on the back of the pizza crust packet; combine one cup of flour with 3/4ths of a cup of hot water with a tsp of sugar , 3/4ths of a tsp of salt and the yeast itself and mix. The Consistency of the dough should be slightly sticky to the touch- keep adding flour until the dough sticks to your fingers and is elastic.

2. Pour flour onto your counter top and spread it out. Also cover your hands in flour. Start molesting the hell out of that dough by pulling it and smushing it together again.

3. Get out your rolling pin (What? You don't have one? They cost like $3 from your local supermarket) Roll out the dough until it's even and larger than your baking tray. Keep dusting the top of the dough to stop it sticking to your rolling pin.

4. Smear butter on the baking tray using a paper towel. Don't use to much butter, but just enough that you get an even translucent coating. place your dough on the tray, and roll the edges as if you were rolling a sleeping bag. These will form the crust. Note: It doesn't matter if your baking tray is square. Pizzas in Italy are square for some reason. Square pizzas are still delicious.

5. Cover your dough base with pesto (don't get any on your crusts). Roughly chop the garlic and spread it evenly. Cover with grated mozzarella (we used an entire pre-shredded pack of the stuff)

6. Rip up the mushrooms by hand (sliced 'shrooms look a tad synthetic). Add to the pizza. Take a handful of spinach and do the same. For extra deliciousness, drizzle with pesto. If using the jar stuff, mix with olive oil to make it liquidy). Here's me drizzilin':

7. Season with salt and pepper and stick it in a pre-heated oven at 450 for 15 mins. This is what it should look like before baking, and after.

And guess what? The total cost per serving (it serves two) is $1.82. This obviously isn't the total cost of all the ingredients, but only the ingredients used. You would have the majority of a bag of spinach left over that could be uses in sandwiches or salads.

Until next time......